I missed it...

My brother-in-law, sister and their kids came for a visit a couple of weeks ago and one of my favorite things to throw out in conversation is.."What is your favorite memory about..."

It's great to hear what moments people value in their life and to reflect on what I have loved myself. It's funny how the same set of people seem to surface in each memory that you have. It's a good way to recognize people that are working hard to invest into you and how much you love each other.

One of the most enjoyable things for me is to reminisce about high school. A lot of people have some pretty hard feelings about those days and would never want to go back but that's not my story.

I mean, don't get me wrong...being a teenager was hard and painful and I have as many "crying" memories as I do "laughing" ones but because my parents sacrificed to put me in a Christian school and my friends were ones that really wanted to do what was right (even though we DIDN'T all the time!)...I really feel blessed that mom and dad set me up for success.

(Quick rabbit trail..)

I'll never forget that. I'll always be thankful that they put me somewhere that I could be trained to do what is right. I know that that is not every parent's decision and I don't judge that...I just can speak from my own realm of experience. I got to be silly and innocent and trusting alot longer than some kids do these days.It was a level of protection that I wouldn't have known that I needed-but they did.

Because of that, Matt and I have given our lives to the belief that God is still working in/through Christian schools. We get paid squat and guess what..that matters "squat" to us now. The same hearts of children that are in public school are found in Christian school classrooms and sometimes they come EVEN harder. It's a mission field all on it's own but its one that we get to venture into WITH a Biblical perspective...totally legal and welcomed. We pay tuition for our boys each month and that has helped me to be sensitive to the sacrifice that many (including my parents) have made and are making.

ANYWAY...

I was walking last night and was scanning since our local Christian radio station drives me NUTS with playing the same songs over and over...seriously, they are driving me to other, less edifying stations!...and I heard a song that I had discovered a few months ago and forgot about.

Trace Adkins sings it and I love it..ahhh, so good and so true. It made me think of my friend, Steph, who spends her day in total sacrifice to her kids and her man and is tired...alot. We were laughing yesterday about another predicament she found herself in and I was internally like, "What the heck? How did she get here? I mean, it makes sense that I'm here. I've spent my life flying into the next thing but she..she's my high school buddy and we should be hanging out right now on a Friday...flirting with the latest cute boy!"

And even with all of that, I wanted to tell her over and over..don't wish this time away. They get big so fast and you'll miss being here. Really.

I know that is what my sister would say..with two kids in college and one starting to drive soon. My parents are the same. Matt's mom has said many times that she would do anything to get back her worse day of mothering back...just to have little ones again.

So...I missed it in high school. I rushed by and now I'd love to have some of those days back.

I missed it when it was just me and Matt. I spent my days worrying about how to have babies and get settled.

Oh, did I miss it with my baby boys. I practically gave those years away in a search for "something more"...more money, more attention, more quiet, more satisfaction.

I don't want to miss this time. With the latest Chapman tragedy on my brain and in my prayers, I'm more aware than ever that I don't get a guarantee about tomorrow and even if I do get to raise my children to adulthood, it goes so fast. I'll wish for these crazy days back.

So..this is for me and Steph and whoever is rushing through days...Let's not miss it this time.

"You're Gonna Miss This"
Trace Adkins


She was staring out the window of their SUV
Complaining, saying "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules"
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says "Baby, just slow down"

Cause you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this"