Ok. I've decided that I will attempt to do a video diary of my surgery. Mostly because it will give my sad little friends plenty of ammunition to mock me from afar and even more so, because I have nothing truly interesting to offer you all to read.
Hopefully taping and posting will begin tomorrow morning on my first venture to the hospital for preliminary activities.
This begins the real life story of Charity getting most of her head taken out...
"You may think you know...but you don't."
(Isn't that how MTV says it?)
Yesterday the hospital called to get some information to pre-register me and to make sure that I had addressed this topic of a "living will".
This conversation can make one of a more sensitive disposition a little uneasy. I mean, is that really necessary? Maybe they read my birth date wrong...I'm only 33. People of this young, tender age should not need to reassure their loved ones to let them live if possible!!!
So, I called my mom and she said she would feel more comfortable with something official written down or a solid conversation with my husband-so I obliged. Matt knows to yank the plug if what is left of my minuscule brain seems non-functioning and I'm going sign a post-it note that day that reads...
"If in doubt-Don't pull my plug out!"
(I SOOO amuse myself!)
I can't leave the decision to Matt or Steph-they'd love to keep me around without the ability to talk! It's like their dream!
I thought of compiling a list of people that would enjoy the job of off-ing me! Maybe we could sell raffle tickets?
Runner-ups could win a free bowl of the fruit jello from the hospital cafeteria!
I'm definitely going to make my mom promise to be sure to create something very "Day Of Our Lives" if it does come to the regrettable. Dim the lights...Matt holds my hand while weeping...all of my friends and family assembling to say how wonderful I was in life...Steph, having applied new lipstick and poofing my bangs for a lovely exit...Ahhh! Yes...
Well, we won't think too much about that. It doesn't actually seem that awful when I contemplate how long I will be paying for this little surgery! I got a letter from the insurance company today congratulating me on being approved for the procedures and explaining my benefits.
Of course, in big letters at the end of the last page was a huge DISCLAIMER about how nothing they have said thus far is guaranteed!
Why didn't they just send me a note that said, "Good Luck!"